Please Help! Can't decide!

[RJE080703]

Alright ladies, I need a little help choosing! FH & I are stuck, we have decided to have the invitation worded as being hosted by US, not hosted by the parents because in reality they aren't paying for anything. My Grandparents are helping out more than either sets of parents on either side, but with that being said we are trying to choose the invitation wording and are stuck with the following three examples, please help!


Option 1

Together with their parents
Melissa Ann Brooks
and
William James Russo
request the honour of your presence
at their marriage
on Saturday, the sixth of June
nineteen hundred and ninety-seven
at three o’clock in the afternoon
First United Church
52 East Main Street
Hanover, Massachusetts

Option 2

Together with their families
Jane Elizabeth Smith
and
Stephen James Richardson
request the honour of your presence
at their marriage
on Saturday, the ninth of June
two thousand and four
at two o'clock
First Church of Christ
219 North Granby Road
Granby, Connecticut

Option 3

Jane Elizabeth Smith
and
Stephen James Richardson
request the honour of your presence
at their marriage
on Saturday, the ninth of June
two thousand and four
at two o'clock
First Church of Christ
219 North Granby Road
Granby, Connecticut

[birdie]

I like the second one. It includes your whole family so your grandparents are included.

[Montanabride]

Third, if you are paying for the wedding i would put your names 1st. This is what we did. My parents were Mad, but oh well they didnt even offer to help and just assumed thier names would be on the invite. . .nope!

Ok sorry a little rant their!!!

But overall they are all nicely done.

[Julz518]

I didn't vote b/c I think it is up to you... If you are at all concerned with ruffling your FMIL's feathers again, then you probably want to go with #1 or #2... If you want to recognize your grandparent's contribution, go with #2... if your really feel like it is more YOUR wedding, then use #3.

Personally, I'm going to be using #3.... it was actually one of the first things my mom asked me about when I got engaged! For me, even though my mom is paying the majority of the cost (w/ dad & I chipping in, FIL's nothing), I feel like b/c FH and I have been together so long, lived together, own a house together, etc. my parents are not "giving" me to him, and really besides the financial aspect, they aren't all that involved in the planning. It is OUR wedding, OUR plans, OUR guest list.

That being said, my mom 100% agreed with my point of view. My FMIL is deceased, and my FFIL doesn't care (as most men). And I don't care what my dad/stepmom say. However, if my mom had ever implied she would be hurt by my doing it this way, then I would probably use "with our parents"...

So I would suggest asking the people who would "really" care about this kind of thing.

Good Luck!

[RJE080703]

Yes, I totally agree Julz. I actually did ask my mom and she said she didnt care either way. And as a matter of fact, MY MOM said do #3 because after all the bull with FMIL she feels FMIL does not deserve ANY credit.

Also, FH & I are in the same boat you & your FH. We have been living together, pay our own bills, cars, & Have a child together, etc. But I know its more traditional to include the family, parents, or names...

Thanks for the enlightening reply. VERY helpful! Thanks Julz

[wembley]

I like the second because it does acknowledge your grandparents and your parents together. It's a nice touch.

[neebelung]

Originally Posted by Montanabride

Third, if you are paying for the wedding i would put your names 1st.

I agree.....

You can add a nice thanks to your Grandparents in your program if you'd like to specifically name them, due to their assistance.

[NovemberGal]

Honestly, as much as I sympathize with and agree with you on your FMIL troubles, I'm not sure the invitation is a good place to get in another little "dig" at her. If it is just going to piss her off more, is it really worth it? I'd suggest #2, because it encompasses your parents but in a vague way, but also encompases your grandparents, who you really do appreciate.

But I agree with Julz, it is really up to you--you just have to decide exactly which statement you really want to make.

[Leslee&Jake]

I vote for #2

[sparklesweetie]

I personally used #2, and that was to include all my family members that helped me with the planning and such. Mom was miffed that her name wasn't on the invitation, but like I told her...tough cookies. DH and I also paid for the entire thing ourselves.

Like Julz said, use what you want to. You won't please everyone so....might as well do it your way.

[SerendipityCrafts]

Originally Posted by neebelung

I agree.....

You can add a nice thanks to your Grandparents in your program if you'd like to specifically name them, due to their assistance.

This was my thought too Wording #3 and then a special thanks to Grandma & Grandpa for their love and support in the wedding program. The parents names will be listed their as well.

[TheaterDiva1]

I like the second one because it acknowledges the families.

Is your wedding really in Granby? I grew up right by there (in Simsbury)! Feel free to PM me if you don't want to make your exact location public.

[Heather]

Mike and I paid for our wedding so I stuck to etiquette and tradition and had the invitation read "Michael and Heather request the honor of..." I figured it was the easiest way since we were truly hosting.

So, my vote is #3 since you two are hosting.

[lucysteans]

hey i prefer the third one its simple and to the point but also has you names at the beginning. I say third one.

[RJE080703]

Originally Posted by TheaterDiva1

I like the second one because it acknowledges the families.

Is your wedding really in Granby? I grew up right by there (in Simsbury)! Feel free to PM me if you don't want to make your exact location public.

No its not, that was just what the sample said. I didnt put our information in the examples. Sorry, its actually in Texas.

[Marksbride]

Originally Posted by neebelung

I agree.....

You can add a nice thanks to your Grandparents in your program if you'd like to specifically name them, due to their assistance.

I agree as well.

[Sh@ks18]

I voted for #2 as well so it includes everyone with no specific names on there (like fmil's)