Bachlorette party Dilemna - The PASH Wedding Forums and Message Boards

mluvsk · #1 05-02-2007, 03:37 AM

4 of my 7 bms are coming to the wedding from out of town (college friends). They will probably be coming in to town two days before the wedding. My MOH and friends here decided it would be best to do the bachlorette party about a month before when I'm not so busy and don't have to worry about hang overs and such. Then one of my really good friends from out of town emailed my MOH wanting to know if she could help with the bachlorette party and everything. I can't have a b party 2 days before the wedding, not with the rehearsal dinner and everything else that will be going on. I feel bad leaving them out of it, but I have to do what is best. So, I'm not sure what to do. Should I have my full blown bachlorette party a few weeks before and maybe have a little "night out" with the friends that come into town? Any suggestions on how to include everyone?

sparklesweetie · #2 05-02-2007, 04:01 AM

Invite them all - if they can come, great, if not, that's fine. I also thinking having a nice night in when they are in town would be nice.

I also agree that having it not right before the wedding is a good idea. It's more fun and less stress on top of everything else.

Heather · #3 05-02-2007, 04:07 AM

I agree with Sparkle. Whomever is hosting this for you should invite everyone. If they can come - wonderful and if not, plan a mellow evening with just your girls the day they get in town (night before rehearsal dinner). Maybe rent a hotel room and have a slumber party, few bottles of wine and maybe a movie or game or two. It doesn't have to be wild, and you'll probably need a night to just relax.

In order to keep the peace, I would have the MOH call the out of town girls ahead of time though, to make sure it's okay with them. After all, they should be a part of the decision making process and it could give them a head's up as to whether they want to come into town for it or contribute financially. If they can't help plan and can't attend, they may have an issue with forking over some cash.

Just have your MOH be diplomatic and all will work out. It's not something YOU should be worrying about young lady.

munchkin · #4 05-02-2007, 04:45 AM

I'm just going to nod along with Heather and Renee.

TheaterDiva1 · #5 05-02-2007, 05:14 AM

Actually, I had my shower and bachelorette party within a few days before the wedding. I had a lot of people (including MOH) come from out of town and this seemed like the best way to include everyone without them having to make a second trip to NY.

anna32182 · #6 05-02-2007, 11:25 AM

to hell with all of them.

whoops. guess i let my inner bitch out on that one. i'm just super angry today.

for sanity's sake, i'm going to go with invite them all, and screw them if they can't come.

Emily · #7 05-02-2007, 11:48 AM

We had our bachelor / hen night two nights before the wedding - because our wedding was at home in NZ and there were alot of people coming over from all over we decided to have it when everyone was in town together - it was fine, we had Friday to recover. We also had a joint one due to time restrictions!

ladedah · #8 05-02-2007, 03:48 PM

All but one of my BM lived in a different state from me...so I understand this all too well!! What we did was three of my BM drove in for a weekend about a month before the wedding and we had a shower and then the bachelorette party that night. We thought about having a little night out a few days before the wedding when everyone was there and we really didn't have time for that when it came right down to it......we did have a night (wednesday before the wedding) when most everyone (family and friends) was there and we built a fire in the fire pit and sat around roasting weenies and marshmallows and having drinks, it was fun and relaxing....

southern belle · #9 05-02-2007, 03:48 PM

i say invite everyone to it and if it is not possible for them to attend. then take that night when they are in and go out to some nice restaurant or maybe all go for manicures and pedicures or something of this nature. this way you are treating yourself to relaxation and having a nice time.

birdie · #10 05-02-2007, 04:07 PM

I'm having mine a few nights before the wedding so I can have all of my friends there. I am getting married in a different state than where I live so it sort of has to be that way though.

Complicated Woman · #11 05-02-2007, 04:11 PM

MY MOH was out of town, too, so my girls had a quiet wine and cheese party at my apartment the night before the wedding. It was actually really fun and relaxing, just what I needed!