Anything you don't want to see in a wedding?

[janeandreawong]

I am sure everyone has attended a wedding. What is it that you do not like to see in a wedding?




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[justnmary]

Over doing memorials of past loved ones. It's a happy occassion, not an after-funeral remembrance.

[munchkin]

Having "Beautiful" by James Blunt, "Angels" by Sarah MacLachlan or "Closer" by Nine Inch Nails played at the wedding. The first one is about a girl he can never have, the second is about suicide, and the third is hugely inappropriate.

[alongroadahead08]

Originally Posted by justnmary

Over doing memorials of past loved ones. It's a happy occassion, not an after-funeral remembrance.

Since this was brought up...honest opinion from you... is 2 definetly (possibly three...depending if he can beat cancer) too many to you? I'm not trying to call you out or anything...I seriously want an opinion on what someone thinks is too much. Definietly 2...possibly 3 at the most. I think personally that's pushing it... but then in steps the FMIL wanting all great grandparents that neither myself of FH were close to, which I think is absurd to have that many. I'm wondering if 3 (grandmother, grandfather, and close uncle to FH) would be considered too much?

[justnmary]

Originally Posted by alongroadahead08

Since this was brought up...honest opinion from you... is 2 definetly (possibly three...depending if he can beat cancer) too many to you? I'm not trying to call you out or anything...I seriously want an opinion on what someone thinks is too much. Definietly 2...possibly 3 at the most. I think personally that's pushing it... but then in steps the FMIL wanting all great grandparents that neither myself of FH were close to, which I think is absurd to have that many. I'm wondering if 3 (grandmother, grandfather, and close uncle to FH) would be considered too much?

I'm not talking person count wise, I'm talking things such as Poster board of pics, Then a table with candles, and flowers and poems, sappy music that makes everyone well up and cry, special announcement during ceremony and the whole sha-bang. One or two gentle reminders of the people that meant a lot to us that are now gone, fine....don't do a shrine. That's all!

[justnmary]

In my wedding all I did was have a white rose put in my mom's place next to where my dad was sitting and I had her name in the program, which I almost didn't do, but I'm glad I did. But I didn't draw attention to it too much. Just enough to let people know she was still being thought of and that she meant a lot to me.

[alongroadahead08]

Originally Posted by justnmary

I'm not talking person count wise, I'm talking things such as Poster board of pics, Then a table with candles, and flowers and poems, sappy music that makes everyone well up and cry, special announcement during ceremony and the whole sha-bang. One or two gentle reminders of the people that meant a lot to us that are now gone, fine....don't do a shrine. That's all!

OHHHHH!!!! total misinterpretation! I'm sorry! I see what you mean now! No...no shrine here. Just 2 maybe 3 simple lit candles. Thank you for clairfying that...lol

[TheaterDiva1]

Originally Posted by justnmary

Over doing memorials of past loved ones. It's a happy occassion, not an after-funeral remembrance.

Thank god you brougt that up... that's been driving me crazy - especially if the deceased is someone most guests may not even know. A simple moment of silence should suffice for close family to remember. If it's a parent of the bride/groom, I'd have a candle or flower, but don't take away from the meaning behind the occasion.

[Marksbride]

I was at a wedding last summer where the bride was walking around and we all saw her before the wedding. My opinon is seeing the bride in her dress should be saved for when she walks down the isle.

[Clarity]

If you have someone sing, have ONE singer. I've been to several weddings in the past that had 2 or 3 seperate people singing. And some not so good!

[justnmary]

No children as flower girls or ring bearers that are too young....1-5 years (IMO) because they will not follow direction and they are scared sh*tless to begin with. Ya, Aunt May might think they are adorable, but those of us who have to wait for the service to start cause it took little Bobbie and Susie 15 minutes to get to the alter is a little annoying. That and all the kicking and screaming really takes away from the moment.

[alongroadahead08]

I"m breaking this one too! LOL... only because they are my only choices...my FG will be 4 and my Rb's (twins) will be 3/12, both mothers are in the wedding and husbands in the front row so i'm hoping they just walk rather quickly down the aisle to their parents and that's it. lol

[TheaterDiva1]

For some reason, at receptions, I cringe when the bride and groom are introduced "for the first time anywhere." I had our DJ leave that phrase out.

And guests being forced to do anything (i.e. bouquet toss). They're fun when it's all voluntary, but no need to embarrass anyone, okay? Same goes for group dances - I was at a party once where the DJ stopped the Electric Slide because people were just standing around. He have a quick tutorial and started from the beginning.

And lets keep special dances to a minimum. Guests can only sit quietly and watch for so long before they get bored and either leave or fall asleep. Having dances scattered throughout the night (instead of having them all back to back) would be good.

And while the garter toss itself is fun, I do not look forward to seeing the groom reach up the bride's dress for it (with a stripper song in the background) - nor do I want to see the guy who catches it put it on the woman who catches the garter. Quite risque for people who barely know each other. I simply had their picture taken together.

And please, no forcing the bride and groom to kiss every five secinds just because you think it's cute. Trust me - they'll have plenty of time for it later.

A wedding ceremony is not a talent show - let's leave it at that.

[feb-bride]

I am not a fan of "overdone" memorials, either. I am with TheaterDiva on pretty much everything that she just posted.

I also don't like when there are more than a couple of readings. I went to one wedding where FIVE different people got up to do readings. It was like, "Enough already!"

On the garter thing that Theater mentioned - I've been to weddings where the groom stuck his head up the bride's dress and removed the garter with his teeth. Maybe this is funny if you're at a wedding with a bunch of young, drunk people, but when grandma and grandpa are there, it's degrading.

Oh, and here's something I almost forgot. I know that a lot of people do this, but I HATE IT when the bride and groom shove cake in each other's faces. How is that a celebration of love when the bride is blowing cake out of her nose? I cringe everytime this happens at a wedding (no, my husband and I did not cram cake into each other's faces, though my husband was feeding me awfully fast, lol).

I was lucky with my choice of FG and RB (my own kids, who were 3 years old and 4 1/2 years old, respectively). My kids are very outgoing and had absolutely no difficulties walking down the aisle.

[Sh@ks18]

If you do have a guest who's going to get up and sing, make sure you okay the song first. A cousin of my friends husband got up and sang "I will always love you" by Whitney Houston

Sample of the lyrics other than the chorus:
Bittersweet
Memories
That is all I'm taking with me
So good-bye
Please don't cry
We both know I'm not what you
You need

My friend was going to shoot his cousin.

Oh and i dont know if this is your song, and i apologize if it is, but if i go to one more wedding where they play "from this moment" by shania twain, im going to scream!

[feb-bride]

Oh, here's another one that I thought of. When the bride and groom kiss, they should do their best to make sure that the guests can't see their tongues. Yuck!

[Marksbride]

If you do have a guest who's going to get up and sing, make sure you okay the song first. A cousin of my friends husband got up and sang "I will always love you" by Whitney Houston

Sample of the lyrics other than the chorus:
Bittersweet
Memories
That is all I'm taking with me
So good-bye
Please don't cry
We both know I'm not what you
You need

My friend was going to shoot his cousin.

Originally Posted by Shaks18

Oh and i dont know if this is your song, and i apologize if it is, but if i go to one more wedding where they play "from this moment" by shania twain, im going to scream!

So true!

[Leslee&Jake]

All These Ladies have great things!! Great help!! I hate really really long ceremonies! Do we really need to be there for over an hour in no ac?

ETA: When we all have to sit around or stand around and wait for photos after the ceremony so that we can let the butterflies go (or throw rice and bird seed) when you leave the church!!!

[munchkin]

Some religions have really long ceremonies Leslee, so I don't think it's necessarily the bride and groom's fault that the ceremony is long. The no AC thing though would be a problem.

[ladedah]

Originally Posted by feb-bride

Oh, and here's something I almost forgot. I know that a lot of people do this, but I HATE IT when the bride and groom shove cake in each other's faces. How is that a celebration of love when the bride is blowing cake out of her nose?

I hate this too!!! Besides...I thought the sentiments were that feeding cake to each other symbolizes "nourishment" and taking care of each other....

Nothing says "I will take care of you all the days of my life" more than smashing the nourishment in thier face!!!

[feb-bride]

Originally Posted by ladedah

Nothing says "I will take care of you all the days of my life" more than smashing the nourishment in thier face!!!

Another "pet peeve" of mine is when there is an excessive time gap between the ceremony and reception.

[Laurie]

My pet peeve...

Is being the guest and having to go through a huge reception line of the wedding party to whom I have no clue who they are ..

My first wedding.. just bride and groom and parents from both sides... short and sweet...

[AshyBekka]

Hahaha-They played "From this Moment" at the last wedding I was in a couple of weeks ago-set my teeth on edge!

And (just as a personal preference), I'm really tired of going to weddings where the bride and groom seem to have picked whatever the latest top 40 pop slow song is as "their" song. I just don't see how something that came out two months ago can be special to them. It's also leading to me hearing the same songs over and over and over again at weddings. Don't get me wrong-if the song speaks to them, that's fine, but just choosing a song because it's new and pretty just seems sorta...well, ordinary.

Also, this wedding I was in in Houston over the holidays had a DJ, which is fine, but he played what i thought was fairly inappropriate for a family gathering. Do you want your grandmother listening to the words to "Get Low"?? (til the sweat drips off my balls...not to mention several f-bombs). Mistaking your reception for a club seems like a big mistake. I honestly think there's a difference between what's appropriate on a weekend out with your friends, and what's appropriate while your parents are present and your flower girls are spinning around the dance floor. But that's just me..

[feb-bride]

Originally Posted by AshyBekka

It's also leading to me hearing the same songs over and over and over again at weddings. Don't get me wrong-if the song speaks to them, that's fine, but just choosing a song because it's new and pretty just seems sorta...well, ordinary.

Can I include father/daughter dance songs in this rant of yours? I remember that when one of my cousins got married (about 14 months before I did), she didn't know what to pick for a father/daughter song. I told her that when I got married, I planned to use the song "Butterfly Kisses" because it was actually appropriate for me and my dad. Guess what song she used? It didn't even apply to her and her dad; they had a very strained relationship at that point in time.

Originally Posted by AshyBekka

Also, this wedding I was in in Houston over the holidays had a DJ, which is fine, but he played what i thought was fairly inappropriate for a family gathering. Do you want your grandmother listening to the words to "Get Low"?? (til the sweat drips off my balls...not to mention several f-bombs). Mistaking your reception for a club seems like a big mistake. I honestly think there's a difference between what's appropriate on a weekend out with your friends, and what's appropriate while your parents are present and your flower girls are spinning around the dance floor. But that's just me..

No, it's not just you. At another one of my cousins' weddings (not the one mentioned above), they played that song "Red-Handed" (or whatever it's called). I think that "Shaggy" is the so-called artist for that song. For those of you who do not know what song I'm talking about, it's the one where he talks about his girlfriend catching him "creeping with the girl next door" - one of the lines is "Picture this, we were both butt-naked, banging on the bathroom floor." There were elderly people and little kids at this wedding. TACKY!!!

[BJC777SRL]

Originally Posted by AshyBekka

I honestly think there's a difference between what's appropriate on a weekend out with your friends, and what's appropriate while your parents are present and your flower girls are spinning around the dance floor. But that's just me..

I couldn't agree more!
The LAST thing I want my poor Grandma to hear is something like "Smack that Ass all on the floor!"