Lutherans Out there! A little help? - The PASH Wedding Forums and Message Boards

BJC777SRL · #1 01-12-2007, 07:54 PM

Ok, here's the deal.

My FH was raised Lutheran. Not immersed in the religion, but that's what he was told he was, and he was baptised Lutheran, and his Dad's whole family is Lutheran. It is highly important to him to have our wedding in a Lutheran church. That's not a problem for me, I just want everything to look pretty. I was raised in a fairly atheist home, but my Baptist grandparents did take me to church for a few years when I was about 10-12, and I was also A YMCA Camp counselor for several years, and part of their "ragging" program which is a personal journey of devotion to God.

Neither of us currently attend a church on Sundays, but we have been going to a couple Lutheran churches for Easter and Christmas Eve for the past couple of years.

Now here's my question/wonderment:

Is there anything I need to know about Lutheran weddings? Or Lutheran Marriages? We're going to meet with the Pastor on the 28th and I'd like to know SOMETHING about the religion, and FH isn't much help. Go figure.

maroki13 · #2 01-12-2007, 07:59 PM

I was raised Lutheran, but I honestly don't know if there is anything significant you need to know about being Lutheran. What I would suggest doing is googling "Lutheran wedding ceremonies" and reading some of the ones you find. That might give you an idea of what to expect during the talk and what to expect from the meeting.
Good luck!

justnmary · #3 01-12-2007, 08:00 PM

I'm Lutheran, but I'm not very active in the church. I was married in a Lutheran church but my hubby is the one that was born and raised in the religion. Lutherans are either Wels or not. The only difference that I know of is that Wels practices that the man is in control/wears the pants/has the final say ect. Which is what I married into but am not in agreement which is a source of a lot of arguements with me and hubby. Other then that, I don't know of any differences. Wish I could help. Maybe someone can clarify what I've tried to say?

WELS=Wisconsin Evangelical Lutheran Synod

BJC777SRL · #4 01-12-2007, 08:03 PM

Oooh Yeah There are like 3 sects I think (I've been researching

) But he's not that kind with the whole man-in-charge-of-everything deal. Off to google I suppose!

I *think* He's ELCA...it might be different initials though LOL!

Julz518 · #5 01-12-2007, 08:04 PM

Well, I'm not Lutheran, but I've been to a few Lutheran weddings and my mom & FH were raised Lutheran... There are different "sects" of Lutheranism (like Missouri-sinod, which is what my mom is), some of which are more strict than others...

In general, the Lutheran weddings I've been to have been pretty standard. The preacher usually says something and they say vows and light the unity candle and all that... the details probably depend on the church and the couple getting married. Have you been to a church wedding? I don't think you're in for any big suprises, just decisions, so you can probably wait to meet with the preacher to figure out the details. But if you want, I guess it wouldn't hurt to look things up online.

Good Luck!

maroki13 · #6 01-12-2007, 08:08 PM

I believe there are 3 different sects, but I can't think of all of them:

Wisconsin Synod

Missouri Synod

and.....one other that I can't think of. One good place that you could look to get an idea is the phone book. Seriously. When we were searching for a church (and we still are) we looked in the phone book. They have churches divided by religion and within religion, divided by sects.

BJC777SRL · #7 01-12-2007, 08:13 PM

The third one is ELCA, which is FH's sect.
Evangelical Lutheran Churches of America I believe

I do already have my church picked out:
http://www.faithlutheranyucaipa.org/

I was just making sure there's nothing specific I should know so I don't make a fool of myself at out counseling session/meeting with the Pastor!

maroki13 · #8 01-12-2007, 08:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BJC777SRL

The third one is ELCA, which is FH's sect.
Evangelical Lutheran Churches of America I believe

I do already have my church picked out:
http://www.faithlutheranyucaipa.org/

I was just making sure there's nothing specific I should know so I don't make a fool of myself at out counseling session/meeting with the Pastor!

I should have remembered that....that is what I was raised.

Julz518 · #9 01-12-2007, 10:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BJC777SRL

I was just making sure there's nothing specific I should know so I don't make a fool of myself at out counseling session/meeting with the Pastor!

I think as long as you don't want to go naked or do some wierd devil-worshipping type ritual, you'll be ok

I doubt many couples know EXACTLY what the "rules" of the ceremony are in the church before the meeting with the Pastor. And you said you were part of the ragging program - so you're familiar with the Christian relgion. I should think that's really all that matters. The rest you'll figure out with the Pastor!

Marge129 · #10 01-12-2007, 10:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Julz518

I doubt many couples know EXACTLY what the "rules" of the ceremony are in the church before the meeting with the Pastor.

Exactly... that's WHY you have the meeting with the Pastor beforehand... so you can LEARN about what will happen and what's expected/allowed.

wembley · #11 01-14-2007, 05:47 PM

Neither DH or I are Lutheran but we were married in a Lutheran setting and it's a "typical" religious wedding service. I don't know about the ELCA specific rules but I'm sure you'll be fine. You might not be able to do a communion because you're not Lutheran but from reading your posts, it doesn't sound like you are hugely religious anyway.