Okay, what you're running up against is Old World etiquette vs. New World etiquette. The people who are saying that it's improper to mention the titles of 'late Mr. and Mrs.....' are confusing the rule. Here's the rule: if your parent is hosting the wedding and the other parent is deceased, you wouldn't put :
"Mrs. Emily Smith and the late Mr. John Smith invite you to..." The etiquette rule says a deceased parent can't be listed as the host of a wedding in the first line.
Now, it is perfectly and wonderfully within your rights as the bride, and in keeping with your deepest values, in tribute to your loving memories of your parents, to include their names under yours, as in 'Daughter of the late Mr. and Mrs.....'
While I know your friends and family are just trying to guide you to 'do the right thing,' you can turn down their advice with warmth and continue on to write your invitations any way you wish. And of course, I'm sure you'll add a personalized note to your wedding programs as well, such as dedicating the floral arrangements in memory of your parents.
You're all clear to include your parents' names exactly the way you want to. Invitations are very personalized these days, and all that matters is how you and your FH feel about it.
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