Tips, Etc....
This is a thread that was started in our old BlissWeddings.com forums by HeatherR on 4/12/04.
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posted by HeatherR
Hi All,
I want to make sure that I have all of my bases covered as far as tips go on the wedding day. I have prepared envelopes with final payment (if necessary) and a tip for the following:
1. Magician ($200/hour, and we only have him for an hour.) Anyone know what the appropriate tip should be?
2. Officiant (Good friend, not charging us.) Going to 'tip' him $250 whether he likes it or not.
3. Maitre'D (Is a $100 tip enough for a 180 person wedding?)
4. Photographer ($50 or $100?)
5. DJ ($50 or $100?)
Both the DJ and the Photographer are under $900...
Another question is do I tip the delivery person who is bringing the flowers on the day of the wedding?
Heather
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posted by catina
Here is my personal opinion.
1) No tip. He's there for one hour and already getting $200.00. That's more than enough if you ask me! If you feel you must give one, $50. If he's really good.
2) Officiant - Perfect. Or if he refuses or is giving you a hard time accepting the money, give the $250 to the church.
3) Maitre'D $100.00 - depends on what all he's doing.
4)Photographer - If you feel really pleased with how he/she has set up the photos and your really confident that they're going to turn out, I'd go with $100.00 If you only give $50.00 he/she may not work too hard at getting the photos to you quickly!
5)DJ - Again, base it on how pleased you are with the services. If he's done a lousy job, he doesn't deserve the $100.
Personally, I like to wait and see what sort of tip they actually deserve. Most tips that I've heard of, are given by the best man after the fact. He's given money with an outline of what it's for and then he'll talk to the bride and groom when it's time to give the individual the tip and they tell him what to give. You may think that's too much for you to worry about during your wedding, but it's a simple question the best man has to ask you. Are you happy with the DJ? Are you happy with the Photographer? Simple yes or no and he knows how much to give.
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posted by Marge129
Heather, I agree with Catina. If someone does a crappy job, don't tip them well. I'm so glad you asked this though, I never thought to tip my photographer and DJ! LOL
Here's my question.... how do we tip the wait staff for our sit down dinner? It's WAY too much to give each of them 15%-20%. Or do you think it will be added into the ending charges since it's a party of "10 or more"??????
Margie
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posted by catina
Marge, I'd talk to the owners or manager. Sometimes it's included in the price, sometimes they add it themselves at the bottom of the tab. Anywhere from 10 -15 % of the total bill, I think.
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posted by FlowluvzMatt
As a server at a fine dining restaurant I would have to go with 15-20% depending on service. Adequate service is usually 15, but if they are good definately go with 20. I have waited on wedding parties before and 20 is the norm now. I would also check with the restaurant, they may add an included tip to the check before they give it to you (you will see it on the check) that is normally 17-19%. Good Luck and Have Fun!!
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posted by feb-bride
FYI - DJs and Photographers are two vendors on the list who brides should NOT expect to tip.
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posted by HeatherR
Thanks for the advice everyone!
Very interesting about the DJ & Photographer...
Heather
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posted by Marge129
Yep... it is interesting. I thank everyone also!
Margie
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posted by feb-bride
Typically, you do NOT tip people who are in business for themselves. This is why you are not expected to tip people like DJs, photographers, videographers, etc.
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posted by HeatherR
Yep! I've been reading up on it today. Almost everything that I've read has stated that they are not tipped, unless they go above and beyond what they are expected to do.
Thanks again everyone!
Heather
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posted by wedgirl
The only "tip" we gave separately was to our pastor. The tip for the resort where we had the reception was already added into the final bill. (I think it was 18%.) Usually, resorts, caterers, restaurants, etc. will add the tip into the final bill.
As for DJs and photographers, I agree that they aren't normally tipped. It is nice, however, to ask if they would like a meal, if you are serving one at the reception. We fed my DJ and the photographer, and they were very appreciative.
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posted by HeatherR
I hope the tip for the ball room/waiters, etc... is included. We have 180 attending and I don't even want to tell you what we're paying per head. There is no way we would be able to "tip" 15 or 20 percent of the bill, lol. However I did call the place today and was told that it is customary to tip the waiter(s) that "take care" of the head table.
Our DJ & Photographer meal is included, our location takes care of them with no expense to us, so they'll be eating.
Does anyone have advice on the person delivering the flowers?
Thanks!
Heather
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posted by wedgirl
Personally, I haven't heard of anyone tipping the person who delivers the flowers. It's usually the florist her/himself who delivers them, and the delivery charge is included in the cost of the flowers. I guess that's kind of a judgement call; the florist is also someone who works for themself. I guess you could tip them if you wanted to, but I didn't think it was required.
Anyone else have thoughts on that?
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posted by Holly
I couldn't be positive on the flowers (we did our own) but I also don't think a tip is required.
We also didn't tip our photographer, but we did give 15% to the restaurant and money to the officiant as well.
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posted by catina
It makes sense not to tip your DJ or Photographer, if they are self employed. However, the DJ we are using, is an employee of a company with a total of about 12 DJ's. Same with the photographer, she's an employee of a company and they also supply and an assistant. I would think a tip is in order, if they are deserving of one. The florist delivery guy, if he goes out of his way to be helpful, I would give him a $10.00 - $20.00 tip. He's delivering the flowers to our house, the grooms house and the church and if he's really helpful, polite, etc I'll tip him.
As far as wait staff goes, for a large number of people (100 +) 15 - 20% is way to much for that size of a bill for that many wait staff people. 10 - 15% would be much more reasonable. But, again, talk to the manager and see. You don't want a huge surprise at the end of it all!!
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posted by feb-bride
Whenever caterers are involved, you should make sure to carefully read your contract. Often, the tip is built into the price you're already paying. If you see any charges that you're not 100% sure what they're for, ask. You don't want to make the mistake of double-tipping or not tipping at all.
As for vendor meals - We fed our photographer, DJ, and videographer. The videographer actually had it in his contract that we had to provide him with a meal. I would have anyway. It's not like he could go grab a burger or something. I would not work for hours at a time without a meal break, so I would never have expected my wedding vendors to do that. You want your vendors at their best, not watching the time to figure out when they will be able to eat.
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posted by HeatherR
We actually just returned from a meeting with the place- gratuity is included, thank god! lol... However he did suggest tipping the two waiters that are catering specifically to the head table. Those two will be going above and beyond, that's for sure.
Thank you for the help everyone!
Heather
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