tipping..? - The PASH Wedding Forums and Message Boards

LadyFaile · #1 08-28-2006, 08:26 AM

i never know who i'm supposed to tip or how much. should i be tipping my planner, minister, florist, dj etc? and how much?

labeadel · #2 08-28-2006, 06:54 PM

I really didn't tip anyone. They all owned their own businesses, and I read that you do not tip business owners as all the money they make is theirs. You should definitely pay the minister something though.

wynelle · #3 08-28-2006, 11:31 PM

Check your contracts... some of them (like catering) already have a service charge of 18% or more. But if a particular waitperson or bartender went out of their way to be great, you can always tip them extra.

DJ- is he independent or part of an entertainment group? If an employee and he does a great job, then tip. If he is an independent contractor and does a great job---tell all your friends how good he was.

Pastor- fee not tip.

Florist- usually not tipped.

Hairstylist/Makeup artist- usually tipped, even if they are independent. Weird, but even if the owner, they probably had to go out of their way to open early, block off several appointments, etc

Photographer- nah, they already charge too much.

DavidsWife · #4 08-28-2006, 11:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by labeadel

I really didn't tip anyone. They all owned their own businesses, and I read that you do not tip business owners as all the money they make is theirs. You should definitely pay the minister something though.

Agreed, I have a personal friend for a DJ, she would not charge me, But I would definalty like to give a little something 50-100ish!

Heather · #5 08-29-2006, 12:03 AM

Mike tipped everyone - and I mean everyone. I had to yell at him at the end of the night to stop tipping.

Feb has a great guide that she sent to me before the wedding, and I'm sure if you do a search online you'll find something.

Here's a Pash article too:
http://www.blissweddings.com/library/gde_tipping.asp

LadyFaile · #6 08-29-2006, 05:37 AM

cool thanks

the dj is through a company but he knows my FBIL and FH so he's giving us a good deal. we're paying for a basic package and getting the biggest package, saving about 300-500 bucks! so we'll probably give him a good tip
the reason i'm not sure about the minister and photographer is because they're hired through my planner, i pay a package price for everything and got to chose my minister and photographer from a list on the planner's website. i don't think they work for him, i think they probably work freelance for a bunch of planners in the area.

VenusElaine · #7 10-09-2006, 02:05 AM

Tipping (also known as a "gratuity", check your contracts) originated as a reward for service above and beyond normal expectations.

In modern times, tips are expected in certain industries because wages have not kept pace with the cost of living. Waitresses, for example, are not paid minimum wage, as they are expected to be tipped. Hairstylists are also expected to be tipped. I am an alteration specialist. I gladly accept tips if I feel I have gone that "extra mile" for my client. Some tip, some do not.

The only wedding vendor that I am aware of who includes the "gratuity" in the contract are caterers. I understand this because people at a reception are guests of the bride and groom and tipping for exceptional service may simply not occur to them. I do believe that allowing a "Tip Jar" is tacky and uncalled for by bartenders at a reception.

I also am someone who believes that tipping is still my choice, not a requirement. Many service personnel offer average or mediocre service, and then expect the tip as an entitlement. They do not receive one from me.

VenusElaine

syringa · #8 10-28-2006, 03:36 AM

Just a word of warning - You say that you hired the photographer and the minister through your planner. Are you paying them directly or are you paying the planner and he/she is paying them? I ask this because if the planner is billing you and then paying them, he/she could be marking up the invoices or taking a cut of what you pay. If he/she is doing that, it may violate consumer protection laws in your state. Most state laws require full disclosure of what you are paying for and you must receive value for your money.

This is one of the "dirty little secrets" that goes on with some planners and other merchants who offer to hire vendors for you, so be sure that you either pay the merchants directly or that you obtain a copy of each person's final invoice before giving payment to the planner.

DragonYoga · #9 10-28-2006, 10:09 AM

I agree with Syringa! It's best to make VERY sure you're not paying any hidden costs AND paying more than you should be.

VenusElaine · #10 11-05-2006, 01:00 AM

I agree, this is a very valid point. As a planner, this person is in the role of a general contractor, and may mark up to pad their purse.
When I sewed home dec, some designers would not contract my services because the end customer would not pay their "add-on" prices.

There is also the possibilty that the planner may accept your money and not pay the "sub-contractors".

This is not meant to scare you, but is something to be considered. The "subs" may then go after you directly if they have not been paid. Always check references and engage a reputable planner!

VenusElaine