ladedah - The PASH Wedding Forums and Message Boards

ladedah · #1 12-05-2005, 07:42 PM

Here is me.....

I am twenty-nine years old and grew up in a small (and I do mean small) Western Nebraska town. My parents divorced when I was seven and I have one younger brother, who next to my fiance, is my best friend. Both of my parents re-married several years after thier divorce. My father to an evil spawn and my mother to a man who has been like a father. Neither of them were married previously and neither had more children.

My father and I had a "daddy's little girl" relationship, until I was no longer a girl. My mother had married my father at a very young age when she became pregnant with me and then became dependent on my father. When he left us she had no skills to speak of...she had no extended education and never before had a job. She went to college at night while working all day and became determined to make sure her children would never have to suffer the same consequence. This became an issue between my father and I. I realized as I grew that my father liked women to be weaker than he so that he would be in control...my mother had made me the exact opposite and I started to challenge him on his opinions and viewpoints...when I started proving him wrong more times than not our relationship suffered. I certainly veiw that as not my decision, but my fathers, and thank my mother every day for giving us strength and courage, and making us realize for ourselves that knowledge really can be power. I went to the University of Nebraska studying liberal sciences because I wanted to be everything...and more so to be away from small town life. I could not decide on a major and felt it was because I had not enough life experience to know what would truly make me happy in life. After graduation....out into the real world I went....

I started working in corporate retail management and enjoyed people so much...but what I really liked was sales...and not just cheesy "I have to sell you something to pay my rent" sales, I mean the "I helped someone today and they will call me two days from now and tell me thank you because I really did help them" sales. So the corporate world was changing and I had been promoted and transferred so much that I find myself in the middle of Kansas (not a far stretch). And I decide that I want to rule the corporate rule, but I think I need a business degree...so I enroll at Kansas State University to persue my MBA in finance.

And the story goes on....when I met a fabulous young man who happens to be a farmer/rancher, that was okay because I was a total anti-long term relationship fanatic and it really didn't matter who I dated as long as I liked them and we had fun. I never expected any relationship of mine to get too much past any serious stage. I was extremely afraid of finding any man remotely close to my father, which is odd because I have a wonderful step-father who was a good influence on my life and I wouldn't be afraid of not finding someone like him...so, my life with the farmer goes on for two years, and we break-up because he is a farmer and feels he is holding me back because he is confined to life in central Kansas while I have dreams of fast paced big city life once I graduate. And here's the clincher...I wasn't sad.....I was devestated....an emotion completely foreign to myself. I couldn't imagine not having this person with me throughout everything, and those traits and qualities of mine that others felt were poor (the independence, the quest for "something more), to my farmer man they were my best qualities. How could I let something like that slip away?

But for some reason once I had sorted all of this out I was amazingly calm, and knew...I just knew....I knew that time would sort it out if I was patient...and it did. We met up six months later and we were back together and without saying it we knew it was forever. One year later, I had graduated and was in the real world once again working as a registerd financial associate for an investment firm, I came home to find my best friend on one knee before me.

So now, the person who had vowed to never get married cannot count the days until April fast enough. And I live in BFE on a farm with my farmer and my little boy (a year old boxer puppy named Rocco), and my fat cat, Mr. Boots; and I suddenly remember liking my childhood growing up on a farm in small town middle America and I can't wait for my children to experience the same things I did.

Marrying_the_Good_Husband · #2 12-05-2005, 07:55 PM

Oh, what a sweet story! So glad things worked out with the farmer! And kudos to mom and step-dad for being a positive influence in your life!

lisa82 · #3 12-05-2005, 08:37 PM

Aww, I love your story! He sounds like a really awsome guy, not wanting to hold you back and all. I'm glad everything has worked out for you guys. So...when so we get to see some pics?

feb-bride · #4 12-06-2005, 08:27 PM

What a great story. Thanks for sharing!

555Ann555 · #5 12-07-2005, 06:19 AM

Thank you for letting me read that, I love your story! So are you still working with the investment firm? I can't imagine that you gave it up!

SuzyBride · #6 12-07-2005, 05:33 PM

You have such a great story! Thank you for sharing! I have me a farmer man too!!!

ladedah · #7 12-07-2005, 06:35 PM

Suzybride....Farmer boys are the best!!!

You guys are all very sweet..I like our story too...because it's ours...

I have a friend who was kind of holding on to a relationship because (I think anyways) it had a "good story". I took me a long time to make her realize that every relationship has a good story...because it's your story. It's been so much fun reading everyones bios and really feeling their excitement for their story.

And....I do still work for the investment firm...I love it..and it's great!!!