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Cirig · #1 03-07-2006, 07:35 PM

SO. I had origionally planned on getting my bridesmaids pearl bracelets. But I found out that my FSIL doesn't like pearl. I asked her something- and she said "I really don't like pearls" So I immediatley though oh crap- what am I gonna do now? SO. Ideas please.

michaelsbride · #2 03-07-2006, 07:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cirig

SO. I had origionally planned on getting my bridesmaids pearl bracelets. But I found out that my FSIL doesn't like pearl. I asked her something- and she said "I really don't like pearls" So I immediatley though oh crap- what am I gonna do now? SO. Ideas please.

Ya know what? I'm so tired of trying to make EVERYONE else happy

... my only advice (to save your sanity) is to do what YOU want and what makes you happy... I'm sure she can stand to have a pearl bracelet for one afternoon/evening. She'd probably wear it again too is my bet.

Heather · #3 03-07-2006, 07:44 PM

I say even though it stinks, be glad she was honest. (This is why I didn't do jewelry as a gift to my BMs, lol.) I would give them pieces specific to their personality. If you don't know, just ask. I'm sure they would appreciate it too.

Complicated Woman · #4 03-07-2006, 07:44 PM

Unless you really have your heart set on pearls, I don't see how it would hurt to buy a different kind of bracelet. If you and FSIL get along for the most part and she's cooperative and supportive, I think it makes sense to give her a gift that you at least think she will like, as opposed to one you know she won't like. My

.

Marrying_the_Good_Husband · #5 03-07-2006, 07:45 PM

I agree. It's really up to you. If you think pearls "go" with your dress and you want them to wear it, get it for them. Otherwise a nice alternative might be a silver cuff bracelet with their name or initials engraved.

Cirig · #6 03-07-2006, 07:52 PM

Yea- I know I should get her something I think she'll like. But I just want to have a hissy fit.

I couldn't care less what I get them all. I just wish my *easy* choice wasn't ruined. SO, now what do I get them??

I just want to clear up- we were talking about something else (not the gift I'm getting her) and she mentioned how she doesn't like pearls. She's not a creep or anything

Lizbet · #7 03-07-2006, 07:53 PM

I say go for the non-matching jewelry that suits each girl's personality.

ETA: But, feel free to have a hissy fit. We're here for you girl!

Complicated Woman · #8 03-07-2006, 07:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cirig

I just want to clear up- we were talking about something else (not the gift I'm getting her) and she mentioned how she doesn't like pearls. She's not a creep or anything

Yeah, I figured that -- if she had responded that way to the gift you were getting her, I'd say give her the pearls anyway.

What about a nice engraved box or a compact mirror or a treat to a professional facial? That's all I've got.

Cirig · #9 03-07-2006, 08:05 PM

Hmmm.. I wanted to get them something that they'll remember, or at least use. I guess I could get everyone something different right? Is anyone else doing that?

I like the idea of the facial- but only really for my FSIL. B/c she is a new mom & she doesn't have a lot of extra money to splurge on anything for herself. The other girls probably would be less interested in that.

Ok- my MOH/ cousin is in school still & is on her way to dental school. She's really busy all the time & doesn't have many hobbies. But can afford to have anything she wants- so she's my real problem if I decide to get everyone different items. B/c I can't imagine what I could give her that she would want/ need & doesn't already have.

Lizbet · #10 03-07-2006, 08:12 PM

Why don't you give MOH the pearls you were going to get anyway and pick other items for the others.

Jennifer · #11 03-07-2006, 08:14 PM

Since my wedding was near Christmas it was easy for me to get ideas of what everyone would want. So I just bought everyone an individual gift...not wedding related. Everyone got something that suited them.

michaelsbride · #12 03-07-2006, 08:21 PM

Since i only have a maid of honor and one bridesmaid, i got them each a Pashmina (ha! PASH!mina) wraps. Its pricey. Sixty bucks each but they're beautiful and cashmere and i know they will be able to use it again as they both live where its freakin' cold (chicago and reno). But they can choose to use it or not at the reception if they get chilly.

Heather · #13 03-07-2006, 08:43 PM

I got each BM (and MOHs) a silver rose candle holder and then I bought each of them a book to their taste. I wrote a note in each and explained why I chose them to stand with me, why I loved them so much, and why I chose the book for them.

You could totally get away with getting something different for your FSIL. She will be family afterall so if she got a little something extra I doubt the other girls would even think twice about it.

Speaking of pashimas - For Xmas I bought one for my Mom, my Sister and my MIL. They all loved them - they're so nice... I believe I only paid $45 each though. If you would like I can try to find the site from where I bought them.

Cirig · #14 03-07-2006, 08:45 PM

I've seen you guys post the pashimas on here. Can I just ask... WTH are they for? Are they shawls?

Lizbet · #15 03-07-2006, 08:47 PM

Yes, they are shawls. They are usually cashmire, but can be made of other materials. I got some for family members for Christmas as well. They were very nice.

I think I used the same site as Heather. It's one that another bride had posted that she used for BM gifts and was impressed by the quality for the price.

ladedah · #16 03-07-2006, 08:50 PM

Cirig...

just to clarify something...are the pearls to wear for the wedding? And then you got everyone a gift?

I bought accessories for everyone to wear with thier BM dresses, but not as thier gift...just for wearing the wedding day...primarily because I didn't want to ask everyone to buy accessories in addition, but I didn't want to give them jewelry I doubt they will ever wear again....

So could you do individual gifts and just have them wear the pearls?

michaelsbride · #17 03-07-2006, 08:55 PM

yeah they're wonderful but i got the extra long extra wide shawls so thats why mine were a little more... Its definitely a fabulous gift for the bm's IMO. and SO many colors too

Cirig · #18 03-07-2006, 08:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ladedah

just to clarify something...are the pearls to wear for the wedding? And then you got everyone a gift?

No- I don't care if they wear jewelery or not to the wedding. I just thought that I would get everyone pearls. The wedding party consists of all family. 2 cousins, 1 cousin in-law, and fsil. Everyone on my side of the family would probably like the pearls. It hadn't occured to me that she may not.

I had planned to get the gift (whatever it may be) and pay for them to have their hair done that day as well.

I'll look into the pashima thing, but I'm wondering if that's really a *young* thing. I know that you girls are young, but I can't imagine anyone using a pashima.. Do you guys use them?

cru5h · #19 03-07-2006, 09:10 PM

I chose Other. I'd either give them all pearls, except for her. Or I'd give them each something they can't help but like, which might mean putting a little thought into each of their personalities. Good luck!

PS I don't know anyone who wears the shawls or pashima things. But I live in south FL. We're a little sexier down here

Heather · #20 03-07-2006, 09:25 PM

I almost bought myself one and still may. I would use it around the house instead of dragging out a blanket. You can also use them as scarves when you're heading out. My MIL loves hers and said she wears it all the time. She's been into a lot of funky colors lately so I got a beige-ish one that would pretty much go with everything. My Mom (light blue for her) is retired so she wears hers on the couch, lol. My sis (black for her) is in her mid-40's and she wears it both around the house and to work.

ETA: Because the pashimas are cashmere, I look at them as a keepsake gift too. If it's not something they'll wear now, I'll bet they'll think it's really special and keep it forever. I may be a little more nostalgic though. I have stuff from years and years ago that I've saved b/c someone thought enough of me to give it to me.

TheaterDiva1 · #21 03-07-2006, 09:37 PM

I voted for non-matching jewelry. I originally wanted to get them birthstone pendants, but I ran into a problem with the company I ordered from, and I had to find something else in a pinch.

ladedah · #22 03-07-2006, 10:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cirig

No- I don't care if they wear jewelery or not to the wedding. I just thought that I would get everyone pearls. The wedding party consists of all family. 2 cousins, 1 cousin in-law, and fsil. Everyone on my side of the family would probably like the pearls. It hadn't occured to me that she may not.

I had planned to get the gift (whatever it may be) and pay for them to have their hair done that day as well.

Gotcha, then i would give the pearls to everyone else and find something different for her...

michaelsbride · #23 03-07-2006, 10:27 PM

If i HAD one i'd use it even on my wedding day... i got my moh and bm the shawls in scarlet they are just so pretty... i think with their black dresses it will be classy but i think it would have gone nice with my dress as well but too much money to throw at myself! lol

deputysgurl · #24 03-07-2006, 11:59 PM

What I am doing it going by each of the girls personalities. That is what i decided, but all my girls like different things.

sparklesweetie · #25 03-08-2006, 01:26 AM

Do memo boards or tote bags. Those are pretty useful items.