? how to invite ?

[ljeagle]

Mom just told me my cousin got his g/f pregnant. He is in the army and is based in NC right now. He has plans on coming to the wedding we grew up really close so I know he wouldn't miss it. None of us knows his G/f they don't live together and I really didn't even know he was seeing one girl. He has always been a man on the move. His g/f has 4 kids to my understanding the kids father passed away. Well when I send him his invite do I include them and if so how would I do that? I didn't want to send him a invite and then him thank he can't bring them or that he had to bring them. 4 more kids to the list grrrrrr. I love kids but if I don't watch there is going to be more kids then adults.

[Cirig]

Don't invite them. Just invite your cousin with the g/f. You haven't met them- you have no obligation to invite them IMO.

Sorry- I didn't read completely. Could you write something like "Cousin, Date's name & Family"

[Complicated Woman]

I would just invite the two adults. Let them know verbally that the kids can come if he wants.

[wembley]

I like CW's idea. Formally invite the adults and then if you are actually willing to have the 4 extra kids, let them know that they are welcome as well. If you don't want 4 more kids, then don't feel obligated. They can find a sitter and have the night to themselves.

[Marge129]

I agree, you don't HAVE to invite her kids. You've never even met HER... why should you invite her kids?! Just send the invite to your cousin and guest.

[ljeagle]

I just felt bad not inviting the kids since they are OFT guest. I'm not even sure how old the kids are.

[ladedah]

I had a hard time about with things like this too.. I would do whatever you feel comfortable with, but I wouldn't feel obligated to invited the kids.

[cru5h]

I think I know what is confusing you: you've already got a lot of kids coming, from what I'm detecting in your message there, and you're thinking she might wonder why hers weren't invited when everyone else's are.

I'd give your cousin a call/write him and tell him you heard the good news and wanted to know how he felt about inviting them/not inviting them. Tell him what you just said, you don't want them to feel like they HAVE to bring the kids, but they're more than welcome to come. (if they are) But I'd stick in there something like, "I bet you guys could use a grown-ups night out." Or something like that. I tried.

[whiddle]

Is your cousin actually with this girl? If so, I would invite her and her kids. But if your cousin just got her pregnant and is just going to be involved in the kids life, like they are not together, then i would just invite your cousin. Does that make sense?

[ljeagle]

What i understand they are a couple. He is in the army and she is a layer and with her having 4 kids they don't have a lot of time by there self. I'm going to email him and ask if he plans on bring her in for the wedding. Then I will take it from there. thanks