Totally understandable
It's completely understandable that anyone might have a concern about speaking in public, and considering that this is an important, sentimental moment between the two of you, your FH has every right to ask for things the way he's most comfortable. So here's what I suggest...
Talk to the pastor about your FH's concern about repeating vows aloud during the ceremony and ask for a 'redesign' of the ceremony so that you would both listen to each section of the vows you desire, repeating 'I do' after each. That matches the traditional model of many different faiths' wedding ceremonies and brings the promises into your ritual. THEN, when the two of you are alone -- perhaps right after the ceremony when you take a ten minute private time for just the two of you -- you can either exchange printed cards that showcase the vows you're written for one another, or speak those words aloud (with or without the champagne toast). I'm a big prononent of having your ceremony be exactly as you wish, and 'choosing your moment' to express the deeper sentiments for your ears only. If you like this idea, you can even have your originally-written vows printed up on parchment and given out as part of your favors scroll or included in your wedding program....or keep them private. You can share them again when you renew your vows on your 10th anniversary! The key is for you to exchange the words in your heart, whether or not you do so in front of a crowd.
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Vows
. He really has no problem telling me (and showing me) how he feels so this is a great way to share our feelings and not have him go insane with anxiety 
. Thank you very much.
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