As a bridal party member, would you like the gift of hair and makeup?

[BridalMUA]

Hello lovely ladies!
I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday season (or is still enjoying theirs!)
I myself was quite busy and am glad to be back into the swing of things.

I am posting this question in response to a few of my clients asking about "gift certificates" and if I offer them. They want to give the gift of hair and makeup on the wedding day for their bridesmaids and MOTB/MOTG. I've always thought it was such a nice touch for brides to do this ( and lots of brides do this for their bridal party, but pay for it in advance rather than actually give certificates) but I thought that perhaps I would get some outside thoughts on the whole situation.

So, question wise:

1) Being a member of a wedding party, would you enjoy getting this as a gift or would you prefer hair and makeup as an option offered to you and you would rather make your own decision regarding it?

2) Would receiving a gift certificate for these services be nice, or would it scream "tacky" to you?

and finally

3) If you were a bridesmaid or matron of honor, suppose you stumbled upon a hair and makeup artistry site that offered gift certificates, would you think of purchasing a certificate in the amount of a hair and makeup package as a gift for the bride from the bridal party (I guess even a fiancee, a MOTB, etc. could do this as well) or would that just seem incredibly intrusive?

I thank all you wonderful ladies in advance, and I am eager to get other minds thinking about this and how you personally would feel about it should you be put in this situation.

Have a safe, healthy and happy New Year!

[davidandbrittany09]

Personally,

1. I wouldn't be too thrilled if the bride made my hair/makeup my gift. If she's insisting that I get it done, then it's not exactly a gift to me. I personally like doing my own makeup/hair, as I know what I like and what looks good. If the bride wants me to get it done, sure, I'll do it - but the bride should pay for it. And I don't think it should be a "gift."

2. Do you mean a gift certificate FOR the wedding day use? If someone gave me a gift certificate to my favorite hair salon so I could get a hair cut/highlights, etc. I'd be thrilled! It costs me a good bit where I go; however, I wouldn't love it as a gift if it was expected to be used towards the wedding day. Does that make sense?

3. Honestly, if the bride had slyly mentioned wanting to get it done or it's up her ally, I think that's a great idea! If my BM or mom, etc. knew I hated doing that type of thing - I'd find it intrusive; however, in general, I think it's a nice thought.

Sorry if these answers seem rude - I don't mean them to be AT ALL!

Good luck

[BridalMUA]

DavidandBrittany09,
Thank you so much for your input! This is exactly the type of response I was looking for (and you didn't come off rude at all!)
As I mentioned, I need "outsiders" opinions on these things because obviously not everyone thinks the same as my team and I do (thank goodness
Keep those opinions coming ladies!

[feb-bride]

If the bride wanted to pay for my hair and make-up IN ADDITION TO whatever gift she gave the bridesmaids, that would be great, but if that was "all" she was getting me, I wouldn't be too thrilled. What if the place she picks is not somewhere I'd want to go? What if I have a "regular" person who does my hair and I'd rather go to him/her? What if I wanted to do my own hair and make-up?

I wouldn't buy the bride a gift certificate for "day-of" hair and make-up unless I knew where she was getting her hair and make-up done.

1) no, I wouldn't be too happy to receive it as a gift. Like Feb said, if it's a gift in addition to something else that's fine, but otherwise no. I've been doing my own makeup for years and I know what works for my ice white skin. It's the same deal with my hair.

2) I think it's pretty tacky.

3) Nope, definitely not a good idea. I wouldn't trust my hair and makeup on my wedding day to someone who is meeting me for the first time.

[BriLJL]

I have a BM who actually EXPECTS that I cover all of her expenses. I had to sit her down and have a talk with her a few months ago to explain that this was not going to happen and that all the other girls were going to take care of their own hair/makeup/dress/shoes/ect.

She said she must have misunderstood what it meant to be a bridesmaid. That blew me away, considering I was her MOH last summer, and she didn't even mention covering any of my expenses at all!

That being said, I think a gift should be a little more sentimental. If the hair is included and all girls are OK with who is providing the service, I think it's a nice addition to a gift and would be nice to have all the girls get together at the same time.

[NovemberGal]

I think if a bride is requiring certain hair or makeup from her BMs (especially if she's requiring where they go), it is nice if she pays for it, but I agree that shouldn't be their primary gifts for being BMs. If a bride can't afford to pay for hair/makeup, IMO, she shouldn't require it--giving updo preferences, maybe, but not a specific style or stylist. But, to be honest, that's nice--but not required. If I'm in a wedding (and I am, this spring--haven't heard yet about hair/makeup), I assume I'll be paying related costs unless informed otherwise by the bride.

Again, if the bride is requiring hairstyles and where to go, it's nice if she pays for it, whether that's setting up payment in advance or giving the girls gift certs to cover it. That doesn't bother me--but I don't see the gift cert as a gift, just as a means of payment for services she's requiring. If you mean as a gift separate from what she wants for the wedding, then as long as she makes sure the gift cert is to a place that the BM uses, that's fine.

As a BM, it would never occur to me to get a gift cert or otherwise purchase hair/makeup services for the bride intended for use on her wedding day. She's arranged exactly what she wants, and unless I know she could use financial assistance (in which case I'd maybe offer to pay for what she wanted, but wouldn't buy a gift cert), I'm staying out of her preparations.

[feb-bride]

I forgot to answer your second question. I would only want to receive a gift certificate for hair and make-up as a bridesmaid present if it was for a salon that I actually frequent, and as long as I wasn't "required" to use it on the wedding day (e.g., save it for the next time I need a cut, color, etc.).

As a bridesmaid, I prefer to receive something sentimental or something I can actually use beyond the wedding (e.g., a framed picture of me with the bride, an item that I collect, etc.). For this reason, I am also not a big fan of receiving "wedding-day-use" jewelry as a bridesmaid present. I don't like feeling like I am "required" to wear a specific necklace and/or earrings, especially if it's something I know that I'll never wear again.

[Sh@ks18]

Originally Posted by feb-bride

I forgot to answer your second question. I would only want to receive a gift certificate for hair and make-up as a bridesmaid present if it was for a salon that I actually frequent, and as long as I wasn't "required" to use it on the wedding day (e.g., save it for the next time I need a cut, color, etc.).

As a bridesmaid, I prefer to receive something sentimental or something I can actually use beyond the wedding (e.g., a framed picture of me with the bride, an item that I collect, etc.). For this reason, I am also not a big fan of receiving "wedding-day-use" jewelry as a bridesmaid present. I don't like feeling like I am "required" to wear a specific necklace and/or earrings, especially if it's something I know that I'll never wear again.

This is EXACTLY how i was going to answer. I have my own hair/makeup lady that i trust and i dont/wouldnt go to anyone else. My sister in law's gift to her BM's were their dresses and she left it up to them to do their hair/makeup wherever and with whoever they wanted.

And I agree with Feb that I would much rather have a picture frame with the bride than any jewelry, tote bag or whatever items that may be out there.

[feb-bride]

Originally Posted by Sh@ks18

And I agree with Feb that I would much rather have a picture frame with the bride than any jewelry, tote bag or whatever items that may be out there.

I brought this up because in one of the weddings I was in (YEARS ago), the bride bought every bridesmaid the exact same necklace/earring set. I'm not a big jewelry wearer, and I am particularly not fond of the color "gold" in jewelry (it wasn't real gold), so other than the wedding day, I never wore it again. I honestly would have rather received just a hand-written note than something that I had no use for. I know it's the thought that counts, but when everyone receives the EXACT same thing, there's not exactly much thought in that type of gift.

[BridalMUA]

Wow! Thank you ladies all so much!
I didn't expect so many of you to chime in, and I am so grateful I feel the same way most of you do, which is why I haven't offered gift certificates before. But since I was being asked at least once every two weeks if we offered them, I thought "Am I not getting something? Is this something I should be offering?" So that is why I brought this particular question to the boards.
I agree that bridesmaids gifts should be individual and much more personal than only hair/makeup. I think it's a nice touch to add on in addition to what is being given, or bridesmaids can choose if they want to take advantage of hair/makeup people being on site for the wedding day, but it's something that is pretty personal and shouldn't be "forced" on to someone.
I think I will just keep things the way they have been, but thanks so much for all of your input.

[wynelle]

Okay-- so I'm different, and I would like to be gifted with make-up and hair. I'm not the best with elegant hairstyles, and would have to go to my particular stylist. Would probably rather have fun going with the group.

Same with make-up. I'm fine for everyday and business, but I use an esthetician for special events. Especially where there is unusual lighting and photography. The last cruise, the photo walls were full of people who were "good at their make-up" but didn't understand the harsh effects of photography lighting. Especially when they had gotten sunburned, or even tanned to a color their makeup no longer matched.

And since I wouldn't really expect a bridesmaid's gift, anything would be nice. And imagine the photo op at the stylist with everyone sitting under the dryer, or six set of feet in little flip-flops getting polished.

[Complicated Woman]

I'll go ahead and say I'm not that particular as far as gifts, so I'd be cool with getting hair and makeup as a gift. I probably wouldn't be super excited about it, but it wouldn't bother or offend me. Shoot, if you threw in a mani-pedi, then I would absolutely love it. Sort of like a mini spa day.

[wynelle]

I like spa days. Wish the economy would shift so I could have one. Although we have a new esthetician program at the local technical college. One can get a facial, a waxing, eyebrows for a very reasonable rate.