Who in here is bi racial &/or in a mixed relationship? - The PASH Wedding Forums and Message Boards

byrd813 · #1 07-11-2008, 09:59 PM

Just wanted to know if there are n e multi racial folks in here, or mixed relationship couples in here. And if n e one has encountered any "problems" or issues with ethinicity or race? I for one am african american and my husband is egyptian. We encounter issues every once and a while, but I dont care cuz I know he looks good and I know I look good (not cocky just confident), and that we both look good together and get along great and love each other. We have a daughter together, and she looks nothing like me. Everyone walks up to her and speaks spanish then when they see me its like "what the hell?" I just wish others knew it wasnt always about color or background...whats your experience?

KaileK · #2 07-11-2008, 10:48 PM

We arent really bi-racial... but DH is part AA.... you really cant tell though (from my siggy pic you would totally think I was lying about his race, but I'm not lol). FIL is AA along with my SIL's etc.

We have never encountered any problems

feb-bride · #3 07-11-2008, 10:50 PM

I am half Portuguese/half white (mix of various cultures) and look like a mix between Causasian and Hispanic (depending on who you ask). My husband is half Japanese and half white and looks like a mix of Japanese and Hispanic. We have two kids who both have my looks and coloring. Sometimes, people don't believe that our kids came from both of us. It's not that big of a deal for us, though.

Sh@ks18 · #4 07-12-2008, 04:58 AM

I'm 75% Armenian and 25% Egyptian (Grandma on dad's side was pure Egyptian) and people always mistake me for hispanic. If you see my brother though, he is complete opposite of me and takes after my mom's side. (Armenians tend to be very light skinned)

stephj · #5 07-13-2008, 12:14 AM

I'm AA, my fiance is white and Filipino... we really haven't experienced any issues about our race... people walk up to him and speak spanish all the time, and he understands a little bit... but not enough to pass for latino! i think it is funny especially since we go to Mexican restaurants often... we both have a lot of tolerance where race issues are concerned... so that helps us see the bigger picture sometimes... his mom is really prejudiced against black people... but loves me... my family doesn't think before they speak and often say things that could offend both of us if we were sensitive!

Emily · #6 07-13-2008, 03:16 PM

I'm quite surprised by this question to be honest - are you serious that people out there in our modern world still have issues with mixed race relationships???

JessLynn · #7 07-13-2008, 04:08 PM

Actually Em, I dated a guy that was AA when I was a freshman in high school - it only lasted one date because we had gone to the movies and they refused to sell us tickets because we were going there together. The guy (who was white) told us to our face with a ton of other people in line that it was because I was "slumming" by being with someone that was AA. The guy that I was dating got pissed off and it started a whole fight and the cops were called and we just never went out again...he thought that it was too much work.

There is a lot of that where I live though, not that I follow that thought pattern at all, but it just seems that there is less tolerance everyday. It's really sad because some people don't understand that there is a whole nother world of culture and history out there that they could learn about if they just opened their eyes and looked past a person's skin color. To each their own I guess.

sparklesweetie · #8 07-13-2008, 04:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Emily

I'm quite surprised by this question to be honest - are you serious that people out there in our modern world still have issues with mixed race relationships???

Yes, there are plenty of people that are still very racist. In my area it's an issue - head down south towards the Ohio river and oh boy, it's like segregation still exists. It's nuts.

Emily · #9 07-13-2008, 06:20 PM

Wow you guys, that blows my mind! I mean colour has never even come into my train of thought! Dams is part Maori (the indeginious(sp?) people of NZ), not that you would know it but he still has the tanned skin and certain features, but its never been an issue. My best friend at work is black and she is amazing, I have never thought of her as being any differnt from me, because she isnt. Wow I am shocked, I just think that people need to wake up and realise that colour isnt an issue. Sorry guys but I am just reeling from this!

This is one of the many reasons why I think people should travel, there is a whole world out there, not just your own town, a whole world of amazing people and amazing different cultures - and I am by no way aiming this at any of you girls, but I am just gobsmacked that people can still be so backward in our world today - it actually makes me really angry!

Heather · #10 07-14-2008, 03:44 AM

It's so many things, Em... It's white against black, black against white, i've experienced issues with Native Americans growing up 10 minutes from a reservation. To this day you'll hear NAs complain about white people taking their land in bars, groceries stores, schools, etc... The reservation by my hometown now has signs all over that state the State Police, IRS, and Border Patrol are terrorists and will not be allowed in to their territory.

A past co-worker and I used to go to lunch together at a local mall, and it never failed that comments were made mostly to him - he's black - from black girls... things like 'can't handle a real woman?', 'she must be a ho', 'OJ Trophy?'

I don't see color either - either you are a jackass or you're not - could care less what color you happen to come in.

As Sparkle said, some areas of the south are still highly involved (for lack of a better word) in segregation, socially of course, not legally. The KKK still exists, but I think it's more of a political party at this point. They murdered thousands in the south. And on the same hand, there are the Black Panthers that fought for the rights of black people, but ultimately caused many deaths, too. They fell apart when a lot of members wanted to segregate and were willing to use guns to make their point.

Each race has it's own extreme groups like these two, but your everyday, run of the mill, discrimintation still exists in all shapes and forms, some subtle, some not so subtle.

feb-bride · #11 07-14-2008, 06:20 PM

You know, come to think of it we did experience some issues because of race when we were earlier in our relationship. It was my husband's mom (she's 100% Japanese). She was nice to me until she realized that her son was serious about me, and then she didn't speak to me for almost three years (until we had a kid together). She wanted her son to be with a traditional Japanese woman, and I do not fit the bill.

byrd813 · #12 07-14-2008, 08:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stephj

I'm AA, my fiance is white and Filipino... we really haven't experienced any issues about our race... people walk up to him and speak spanish all the time, and he understands a little bit... but not enough to pass for latino! i think it is funny especially since we go to Mexican restaurants often... we both have a lot of tolerance where race issues are concerned... so that helps us see the bigger picture sometimes... his mom is really prejudiced against black people... but loves me... my family doesn't think before they speak and often say things that could offend both of us if we were sensitive!

People speak spanish to my hubby all the time, its kinda funny cuz he just goes along with it acting like he understands it n stuff. One day I was at a mexican restaurant where these group of girls were just staring at my husband, i know he's really attractive and it doesnt bother me if other folks look at him, he's still mine

. But when I left to go to the bathroom and came back, he told me that they were telling him that he's wrong for lowering the hispanic race by marrying a black chick. First off HE AINT SPANISH!! Second off, how dare you? Most people that are racist most likely have various blood running through them. Black, white, asian, yellow orange, green. My background is composed of French, & German, Dutch and of course African. We are all melting pots, no one is pure, and it still doesnt make sense, but hey i'm over and above it. What will be will be, it just depends on how you handle and deal with it.

Rare Breed · #13 07-15-2008, 09:19 PM

I am not in a mixed relationship, but this IS an issue I have already been thinking about since my son is adopted, and he is biracial (white/african american.) Sometimes my wife (who is also white) and I get a look here and there like someone is trying to figure out how we all go together, but for the most part, we have had no issues.

We've already discussed that no matter WHO our son decides to marry, we are behind him 100%. Race is not an issue for us.