21st June 2008 Saturday
Ok I am no good at writing this kind of thing, so I will give it my best shot!
4am I sleepily reached out and grabbed my phone and sent a simple 4 letter text to my hunni….
Boo x No I love you, or I miss you, just boo x!
Getting no reply, I rolled over and went back to sleep, ppfftt fine so much for you saying you would not be able to sleep without me there!
6am I stretched, belched, (well I was hungover!) yawned, and looked at the ceiling and couldn’t work out were I was, then it slowly dawned on me that I was meant to be doing something that day but the life of me I couldn’t figure it out, so I went to the bathroom, opened the cabinet to clean my teeth, when I shut it I saw myself in the mirror, when I saw myself with toothpaste round my mouth and half way through brushing, I stood there dumbfounded and said OMG I’M GETTING MARRIED TODAY! With that sufficiently sprayed the wall and mirror with toothpaste!
With that I promptly bounced downstairs, grabbed biscuit’s a cup of tea and did the only think I could……came straight onto the forum in the hope of finding someone else on line…..No one around!
I was strangely very calm, as I walked round the house making sure I was doing nothing I should have been doing!
I remember the firemen open day and texted terry saying I am thinking of paying them a visit! I get a reply, I don’t think they could handle a hyper bride with talons! Ppfft thanks!
I head to the shower and spend a happy 10mins, trying to lather on the Jo Lo glow shower gel wondering if the smells gonna last all day!
Suddenly my landline rang, making me jump I grabbed it to find my brother on the other end wanting a list of what they needed to bring, stating they were aiming to be down by 9:30.
I put down the phone and decided to…..well you guessed it get back online!
About 9:20 my door went and my brother and his fiancé wandered in, I glanced up and breathed a huge sigh of relief…..
As a typical bride to be I wanted terry to know nothing about my dress, so somehow in only a way a women can I convinced him my dress was 80’s style, white, with a pink and green floral bodice, I managed to get everyone he and I knows to help with the lil white lie!
On discovering this my brother cruelly decided to claim to me, he was going to wear a green and yellow Hawaiian shirt to my day, I was not a happy bunny, but didn’t want any more arguments!
Hence huge sigh of relief on production of A navy blue suit and purple shirt, (just don’t mention the cherry red Dms!)
Suddenly lil ole me thought brill I can have one last wind up of terry, before we wed, So I promptly texted him saying think 60’s/80’s and you have me and my brother walking down the aisle towards you!
I got no response….Oh dear!
My brother and his fiancé sat on the sofa and did…nothing! I was due to leave for a hair appointment that was organised at 11pm the night before but didn’t feel happy as nothing seemed to be getting done…
Wha??? I’m the bride, I had long false nails, surely I couldn’t be expected to do much! It was a injury inducing experience going toilet with them let alone do anything else whilst wearing them!
1015 a knock at the door, my friend had arrived to take me to my hair dresser, someone who I hadn’t met and I hadn’t had a hair trial with ..I was scared! Yes scared!
As I was about to leave a second knock on the door. Finally my angel in disguise had arrived, Karen, the best mans wife was here, with a hurried the lazy buggers are in there I’m outta here, I left her to sort them out!
Arriving at a youth centre I wondered what on earth my friend had set up for me, peering carefully round the door, my friend opens the door and I went flying into the room, such a graceful entrance,
I tried to show the women my dress and veil and tiara for her to ignore me and start going on about make up, baffled I said I have make up lady I don’t need it done, just hair, Oh I must do your make up, No I reply I have make up lady, you hairdresser not make up! But nope she insisted, to scared to run from this women, I sat shaking,
Looking round I see a huge make up sponge heading my direction, before I had a chance to duck, my face was pounded by wet slimey stuff, that wouldn’t have felt out of place in a bog,
On finishing painting my face with slime, she proceeded to come at me with a kids paintbrush, barking instructions of shut your eyes, don’t smile, sit still, that’s it, nearly done, Suddenly open you eyes was the next order,
So I opened my eyes just as a black blob started stoking my eye lashes in a strange fashion, then a gust of wind came out of no were,
Odd I thought the windows were all shut, when I realised it was the scarey lady blowing in my face! Patting the air away like a kitten being blown I glare at her, as I watch her aim towards the hair straightners, I think to myself, Oh god help me, terry doesn’t need me bald to, one of us is enough!
Head pulled back, I dream of scratching my face with a scouring pad to get off my make up, anything to get my mind off my head!
My friend was sat there saying how good I looked, how amazing a job was being done….er yea ok! Repeat that when terry’s running out the nearest door when he sees this bizarre clown wearing a purple meringue suit comes walking towards him!
Finally I am in the car on the way home, I text Karen, warning her the bathroom better be empty when I run up the stairs and if she isn’t up those stairs after me there will be pain!
She replied this lot here are organised, so don’t worry, I will be up those stairs after you.
Arriving home, I make a mad dash for the door to find it blocked by a photographer and my bro, throwing them out the way I dive for the stairs, scramble up them, aim for the bathroom, switch on the shower and run it over my face,
OO your hair looks good says a voice behind me, hair who cares about my hair, get this stuff off my face first! Finally my skin breathes as its brought back to normality, I look over and Karen says, Oh I though you had taken the make up off already didn’t look like you had any on!
I was told its 1130 you need to start getting ready….Get ready, noo can’t do that I need to check online, I log on and check all my mail and even manage to chat on line,
I glance up and see everyone around me, acting like headless chickens, but I manage to find time to chat on msn.
Suddenly my arm is grabbed…Liz is here get upstairs…Grabbing the computer I hold on for dear life, nails digging in, claw marks down the side as I’m dragged away howling, Noooooooo I’m not ready,
No my dear your not ready that’s why your running late.
Seeing Liz it sinks in its Liz, grabbing her for a hug I head upstairs, closely followed by karen and the photographer,
I watch as Liz empties her make up box all over the place, oo now this looks like a box of delights,
I sit back and spend the next half hour getting pampered, and loving it!
Liz and the photographer kept me entertained with their lil dance around me as they kept switching places, and moving around the room, trying to fit into a small room with a huge dress hung on the wall is not an easy feat you know!
Pandemonium downstairs ensues as my car arrives, she booked me for 1230 I hear the chauffeur say, No I didn’t I try to yell, Ignored I sat back and thought pppffttt you can wait the ceremony isn’t till 230pm!
With the photographer snapping away I get handed a mirror and nearly had a heart attack…..Who was this strange looking women looking back at me, what had Liz done, Omg…………..I loved it! So much for going simple and understated, this was OTT glam and Well wow!
I was told to spray deodorant, thanks liz is that your polite way of saying your sweating and stink! Luv ya to hun! (well that answers my earlier show question then!)
Slapping on the Jo Lo Glow body lotion, I wonder how I’m going to get the dress on, when I realise undies, weres me new underwear, I run round and find it tucked away, handing it to Karen I started to undress ready, I had to have a hand getting the bra on and made strapless, stood there in just a thong and half a bra I pray the photographer doesn’t wonder up the stairs.
A few moments later I was ready for my dress, 2 women and one bride stood there trying to work it out, but we eventually got there, with a tug here, a shove there, a stopping of a breathing every so often, I am eventually stood in it, wondering if I was ever going to find my feet to put my shoes on!
Time for Veil and tiara, It was then I noticed..actually scarey women had not done to bad a job on my hair! So veil in…easy…tiara…forget it after 3 attempts its put to one side, another was grabbed and plonked on my head, jewellery was put in and I was sent to the stairs, my final moments in my house as a single women nearly over!
Plonking my butt on the sofa I constantly yell at people to keep the front door shut, Liz bless her gets eaten by purple fluffy dress as she goes on a hunt for my feet, I thought if shes not out in 10 Ill call on the firemen!
Thankfully she comes up in one piece, its then I’m ready to go!
Breathing as best as I could in big purple ten ton dress, I wobble to the door, and look out seeing my car, what I am doing still not sunk in, Like I do this every day, I grab up the many layers of dress and head out,
The chauffer piles me into the car, miles of dress pushed in behind me, I straighten, then play hunt the house keys as they are thrown into the mounds of tulle , I sit grin and I’m ready to go……………..
Part 2
Sitting in the car, I leave my home, nothing really sinking in, I was surrounded by mounds of dress, and once I had located my house keys, I went on a hunt the clutch bag game!
I occasionally tried talking to my Bridesmaid Celia, but she was showing no interest at all, so I thought , stuff you then, grabbed my mobile and spent a happy 45 mins randomly texting whoever was daft enough to reply to my pointless waffle!
I needed reassurance I looked good, so again asked Celia, but nope, all I got was I suppose you look ok, you look a lot like Zoe (my sister) feeling a bit hurt I took some self portraits on my mobile and sent them out, getting impatient for replies I bugged the chauffer , on being reassured I will make one waiting man very happy, I went back to my mobile!
I wanted to arrive at the museum at 2:15 pm on the dot, no idea why just 2:15 pm on the dot sounded good! As 2pm arrived and left I kept watching the clock,
2:07 : heading down the hill towards the Museum
2:09 : chauffer decides a trip round the car park would be fun (wouldn’t admit he took a wrong turn!)
2:11 finally find exit to car park
2:16: pull up outside the museum!
Not bad timing I thought, I glance around me and realise the car is getting a bit of attention, I grin at the camera as I wait for the chauffer to let me out the car, I spent a few mins locating my feet, pulled the dress up and aimed for the floor, I stood praying I was not stood on any loose tulle and took a small step forward to check, Phew all fine there, suddenly all I can hear….wow she looks amazing, her dress is stunning, a lil girl saying I looked like a princess!!
We stop for a few photographs, when my veil decides to take a trip else were without me, the photographers wife makes a mad dash for it, the photographer muttering that’s the first time I have seen her run since we married!
I try to head in doors trying to hide from the wind, but the photographer insisted on some windswept photos!
Suddenly a lil figure comes dashing forward, one guest running late, because she had parked the wrong end of town, typical Devonshire bird! amy grabbed me in a huge hug and was then sent on her way up to the room with the other guests
Eventually I manage to slowly back into the building smiling sweetly as to say I’m stood still honest!
I head for the lift, step inside, tuck my dress in, making sure nothing is caught in the door and go on up to met the registrar.
Suddenly realising I needed the toilet I call for Karen, but she had dashed off some were, I wait for the disabled loos but it was busy, so braved the small cubicles, Karen eventually appeared and gave me a hand with the mounds of dress!
On leaving the loo I noticed a false nail had come loose, so someone is sent back to the car to find my clutch bag to get my nail glue!
I headed in to see the registrar, trying to fit past the row of chairs in the theatre, I meet with them and sat down just as my nail glue is handed to me, I spent the next few mins trying to reattach my nail whilst pretending to listen to what was being said!
Finally the words I had been waiting to hear were said…lets go, time to meet Terry!
I couldn’t wait, for months he was led to believe my dress was 80s pink and green, my lie was about to be uncovered! Oh dear!
I start towards the long corridor, I stand at one end and see the door down the other end, I brace myself and start the long walk down, halfway I am stopped by someone who works in the museum, ok Ill go tell them your ready, I said whoa not quite I have steps to negotiate first,
Seconds later, I hear Katherine Jenkins, Kiss from a rose, Omg I am not even near the door, what’s going on, that’s my song stop!
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=6mBE9MAtAA0
But nope, with that my brother and Celia start getting impatient so I told Celia to go, don’t wait for me, looking grumpy she flounced off into the room and rushed down the aisle,
I mention I want my veil pulled over my face to be told we didn’t have time, with that I was pretty much dragged to the door, I slap on a smile which turns into a huge grin as soon I see terry stood there, before I knew it my brother had me rushed down the aisle and into terry’s arms, My brother stands there till he was told to sit,
I look up at my soon to be Hubby, smiling he whispers you look beautiful, that being all the reassurance I needed, we turned to the registrar and the ceremony began.
Soon all the months of planning and stress were over, our time had come,
On the spoken words of does anyone here present object to this marriage, terry squeezed my hands so tight, hoping our worst fears wouldn’t come true, I looked deep into his eyes, smiling, relief, as we realised our main hurdle was over,
Our vows were spoken, Terry’s loud and clear, mine more a whisper, but soon we were entwined, together forever as man and wife,
We turn to the guests, both breathing a sigh of relief, happy that it had gone as well as it could have done,
I negotiated the table in the corner to sign the registrar, a feat in the purple fluffy dress, I managed to ask Terry what he thought, he replied….. My first thought was wow, then you cow you have lied to me for the past few months! I said yep and so did everyone else around you!
I turn back and start smiling for the camera not giving him a chance to reply, well he was my husband by then he better start learning who wears the trousers! Lol just kidding!
Our wittnesses were called forward looking at me sat in my dress they walk round the other side of the table, people to scared to come near me,
Watch my dress, your stood on it, Oi budge I need room for my dress, Watch it your too close, were the main words heard from me for quite a while!
At this point the photographer wanted to get group shots, so we spent the next 20 mins having photos taken in the room, around the arch, family groups shots, and on the balcony,
before he took terry and I off for some fun shots around the museum!
We found a jet ski, and a life boat, we peeped round some column, I nearly tripped down the stairs after a piece tulle thought it would be funny to catch on my shoe, grabbing Terry I made it to the bottom safely!
I don’t know basically we just had fun, we got face ache from grinning so much, walking around the museum, we continued to get comments, and people still commented on my dress!
Finally time to try get everyone together down stairs, for some more group shots, ok seriously now the photos are the boring part so I am going to end part 2 here and start again with part 3 in a bit, and the bit I know a lot of you are waiting for the Mc donalds part! Lol
Part 3
On leaving the museum the photographer was insisting on more windswept photos, the ground was wet so I started having a bridezilla moment, ‘my dress is getting wet, I’m cold and so forth!
The car appeared and I was bundled into it again, Terry managed to find a small space to squash in beside me, I glare at him as he makes sure he has no tulle tucked under him, then we turn and start smiling for the camera again!
We head off up the road when the chauffer announces he has bubbly in the boot, boot what’s it doing in the boot, so he pulls over and gets it out, we have a few sips as the car pulls away, realising I have no balance and not wanting to do a trash the dress moment just yet, I hand terry the glass and he empties half into his!
We are at this point aiming for Mc Donalds, food was a must, Though how I was going to fit it in I didn’t know, I could hardly breathe let alone anything else!
We pulled up to see a few workers outside, Terry and I glanced at each other, Uh Oh this is gonna be fun!
Again I have to be helped out the car, careful not to land in a puddle or let tulle get caught in my heels,
We are told by the photographer to stand in front of the car, its then I notice another photographer snapping away, I felt really uncomfortable and couldn’t wait to get inside,
We headed towards the door and noticed the staff stood with burger flipper thingys in the style of the guard of honour! OMG! Mad mad people!
Asked to pose for more photos, I start chatting to one of the workers, to discover the other photographer was not one of theirs, Ok I was worried by that point and wanted to get inside asap,
(we later learnt that at one point our photographer heard this other guy mutter right got our shot lets go!)
We head indoors to find a crowded restaurant, everyone clapping and cheering us, congratulations coming from every angle, more comments on my dress, Not sure were to look, I aim for the reserved table in the corner and work my way into the corner! We received a bottle of champagne and a card, and there was a bunch of flowers, from the staff,
We ordered food then spent a happy 15mins alone for the first time properly as man and wife (well as alone as you can be when you have a camera in your face!)
We asked the area manager to find out who that other guy was to be told when he was asked he either ignored them or walked away, in the end our photographer went over and asked, only to get the reply.. ‘I’m a teacher’ for the guy to then leg it!
Just in case any one is wondering I did not spill burger sauce down my dress! Nor did I lose any fries in the mountains of tulle!!
We didn’t want to stay to long, due to the waiting guests at the reception, As I stood up I looked around me and realised the place was pretty much empty, oo were they all go, do we smell that bad?!!
Saying our goodbyes, we head for the car, for another round of getting the dress into the car without catching any tulle, or falling head first in (now that would be chav tastic!)
Part 4
Off to the reception we go, happy, full and totally in love!
We pull up at the county arms in truro to find most of the guest only just turning up themselves, I’m assuming looking at some of the non professional pics, most decided to have a play at the museum!
More photos, serious face ache by this point, I hand Terry my bouquet and have a kick and spin in my dress,
No point to it, just wanted to see if I could do one of those Disney movie princess moments and get my dress to spin, but nope just resulted in getting dizzy and caught up in a load of tulle and in fits of giggles!
So terry and a few other people get called over to pose for photos, Boring boring, boring, so I will skip this bit and walk you into the pub….Pubs always good they have alcohol there!
We hadn’t seen the reception as his mother had organised everything, leaving it all as a surprise for us (at our request may I add!)
I knew we had balloons and a cake but that’s about it!
Walking in, I am asked to pose for more photos, with some guests, the photographer took a couple and said right downstairs!
So leaving the guests at the bar, we head downstairs, not knowing what to expect, terry had to walk down first as no way would I have fitted down those stairs with him beside me or even 2 steps ahead!
What I saw was wicked, a cup cake wedding cake with a separate tier just for me and terry! (which we still have yet to taste, we didn’t even get a cupcake!)
More photos………..BORING! On to the party!
Well if you can call it that! Everyone came down, no buffet yet, that was later!
I collapsed on a chair or 3! Stating I was not moving again! I was hot, feet aching and thought no more photos,
the dress weighs a ton I had had enough!!! It was no easy feat wearing that all day! But being the stubborn women I am, I was determined to wear it till Terry took a crowbar to it to get it off!!
But nope photographer had other ideas!
So flouncing off upstairs (well as best as I can when I am carrying most the dress in my arms, praying no one was walking up behind me, Arse shot not good!)
Getting to the top, I grin and start playing it up! (Think I have been watching to much Katie Price!)
the photos came out brilliantly, apparently those are the best of the ones of me alone!) Terry stood at the bottom calling up sarcy comments, so I stuck my finger up, which the photographer got on camera! With that I went down and started to drag him up the stairs, photographer saw that as another good photo so started getting snap happy again!
Some of the last photos are my absolute favourite, Just terry and I looking deep into each others eyes and really feeling the mood, I think personally the photographer captured more in those few moments then he did the rest of the day!
Finally he left and we went back downstairs to mingle, well terry mingled, I went back to taking up 3 chairs, happily drinking Malibu and coke,
Well until I decided I needed the loo again! Dragging Karen out from her corner, we go upstairs to try find a disabled loo, were my dignity went back out the window (wha ya mean I never had any in the first place! Ppffttt!!) She helped me out with mounds of dress to stop them falling down the loo!
I managed to chat to a few but no one was introducing me to this huge new family, a couple of people came over to say hello, but all they got back was watch my dress, nooo!! So, scared the toodled off back to their seats, looking bemused at this crazy bride howling about her dress getting trodden on every 5 mins!
At one point I walk past a group of people I suddenly stop look down, glare at this guys back, the women next to him to looked down, a look of horror on her face, she shoves the guy forward and apologises, A piece of tulle had been pulled off, OMG NOOOO!
Gathering my skirt up in my arms, I wobble unsteadily to Karen, holding the piece of tulle out in front of me, I hand it to her, with the simple word of help! Rolling her eyes, she tries to pin it with a safety pin.
I’m sitting hugging my friends gorgeous lil girl, when I get a tap on my shoulder, it was my BM handing me her wrist corsage, and my brothers button hole, I looked at her puzzled, she said here take them, there yours, no I reply, I brought them for you both, she says well I don’t want them, I say well what I am supposed to do with them, I am off on my honey moon, sell them on eBay came back at me, I look at her disgusted at her attitude and replied they are yours! With that she said something about the cats and huffed off!
Half hour later I go looking for her and my brother to ask them something to find they had both left the party without so much as a goodbye, I was so hurt, they came, threw me down the aisle, forced themselves to pose for a few photos, ate free food then Fkd off without so much as saying hello or goodbye or even thank you to anyone. How so very rude,
Soon it was time for my first dance with terry, gathering the skirt up in my hand so not to trip, I grab his arse, and off we go in a aimless circle not sure what to do! After a couple moments, I realise the pin had come undone and was quite happily sticking into my hand, I try to pull away from terry for him to hold me tighter, grabbing his arse hard I try to make the pin go in his direction, but no luck! Oh well suffer I must!
We kept asking each other when the song was going to stop, as everyone was looking at us and we were feeling embarrassed (Oh doh they been looking at you all day and now in the darkened room you feel embarrassed! Right Alice logic there some were!)
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=jrbMAVQXWdA
Finally the last notes rang out and we dashed off to the safety of the corner, I realise my friend had been using my camera along with other guests, peeking between my fingers, I glance at some ones camera and see a close up of my hands on terry’s butt! Oh dear god help us!!! Nooo!! Delete them! (I know I know in ten years Ill look back on these photos and be grateful of every memory but right now nooo!)
A few people came over to me to chat that I knew, Karen, and my sister and Mandy, but they all knew to keep at a safe distance!
There’s not much else to say really! Terry and I left about 10pm, under a huge arch of arms (cant wait to see those pictures!)
We didn’t get any cake, we left to a beautiful instrumental version of def leppard, when love and hate collide, up the stairs yet another mission in my dress but what I thought was the final hurdle (later proved wrong when I gave some porters an eyeful!)
So out the pub we go into our waiting car (which we had all day!) and off we went to meet cedrick and to spend my first wedding night balling my eyes out!! Oh well!
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=CegfHFkWAMI
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=SOEk9z3kA0Y&feature=user
My Uk 21st june wedding
I did look at your photos and they are lovely! I love all the lilac accents.
Linear Mode
