bridal party?

[form3hide]

Hey all,

Well, we just started planning our wedding and got into discussing the bridal party -- but I have a dilemma.

I have one best friend, my older brother who I absolutely want to be my best man. However, the rest of the grooms side? I'm not so sure.

I have many friends, but none of them are 'good' friends -- know what I'm saying? So, how do I determine who's in and who's out?

One of them is my best friend growing up. We still talk from time to time, and usually get together about 6 times out of the year or so. We've grown quite apart over the years, but such is life -- however, I do still consider him a close friend. So, I should definitely include him, right?

I have a handful of other people who I regularly talk to and occasionally hang out with, but I wouldn't really consider them 'close,' you know?

Also, I have a female friend that I consider to be a good friend. I've been good friends with her since middle school, and we always talk and get together. So, shouldn't I, in theory, include her on my side?

Ahhh!

[Brandonsgirl]

I don't really have a helpful answer for you...I would pick the guys that you're most close to NOW...versus...how good of friends you've been friends with them...whose been there for you...who do you hang out with more...who do you hae fun with...who do you feel are your best friends...

I know it's hard since you say you don't have many "close" friends...but just think about it...talk to your bride-to-be about it...I'm sure she has some ideas!

[Julz518]

Do you know how many attendants your bride is plannign on having? If you guys want to have equal numbers, you should probably talk to her and find out how many attendants you "need". Brides usually have an easier time picking their attendants, so she should be able to guide you in the right direction.

IMO, yes, your female friend can be "your" attendant. She can wear the same dress as the BMs (or maybe a black dress to go with the tuxes), but stand on your side.

When I was choosing, I went with people that I thought I would still keep in touch with even if I moved away. People who's children call me "aunt" and who I that I would likely raise my children with. I don't see a couple of them very often, but they have been friends sine HS and I 've always been in touch with them. I have another friend that I see almost weekly that I didn't include b/c I haven't been friends with her as long and I'm not sure we'd keep in touch if I moved away.

[form3hide]

my fiance is in a similar situation as i am... so it does make everything easier to figure out

[feb-bride]

I say that you should ask who you want to be on your side - regardless of the person being male or female.

[ladedah]

I don't think there is a set number that you "have to have"...if each of you only want one attendant....have only one....you don't even have to have equal numbers on each side...

[form3hide]

Yeah, I think we're just going to wing everything -- we're not about the standards of a 'traditional' wedding, so why should the bridal party?

[ladedah]

excellent point!!